Thugs, drink-driving teens, rapists, even the innocent, have appeared on the news for years, often peeking out from under a variety of props in an effort to hide their identity. Most recently I spotted someone walking to the Melbourne Magistrates’ Court with her face buried in a daggy zebra-print shawl. She’d been charged with attempting to murder her husband by poisoning his meal of meatballs, and clearly didn’t want her mug on the evening news. But while I discovered the shame is often the same, the effort that those accused put in to their pitiful subterfuge varies. Here, I rank a few recent efforts: