June 2014

The Nation Reviewed

Names of the game

By Peter Cronin
A singular analysis of AFL players’ names

AFL FOOTBALLERS’ NAMES IN 2014 SUITABLE FOR A ROMANTIC WEEKEND GETAWAY DESTINATION

Beau Waters, Blake Acres, Jared Rivers, Oliver Wines, Michael Close, Brian Lake

NAMES SUITABLE FOR THE LOCATION OF SOME MISCHIEF, A MUGGING OR EVEN A MURDER

Harrison Marsh, Campbell Heath, Easton Wood, Bradley Hill, Dean Towers

NAMES RIPE FOR SPOONERISM

Jed Bews, Dane Rampe, Matt Shaw, Nat Fyfe, Karmichael Hunt

NAMES THAT SOUND REMARKABLY LIKE A BRAND 

Seb Tape, Jed Lamb, Claye Beams, Will Hams, Tayte Pears, Daniel Currie, Chris Dawes

SURNAMES SUITABLE FOR A COCKTAIL INCORPORATING CAMPARI OR AMARETTO

Cassisi, Firrito, Morabito, Deledio, Bontempelli, Menegola

SURNAMES SUITABLE FOR A MIDDLE-EUROPEAN SMOKED SAUSAGE

Schoenmakers, Schroder, Leuenberger, Petrenko, Malceski, Karnezis

NAMES SUITABLE FOR A RASCALLY, MISUNDERSTOOD CRIMINAL WITH A HEART OF GOLD OR A LOVEABLE ORPHAN WHO RISES ABOVE HIS STATION BY INHERITING A SUBSTANTIAL FORTUNE

Sam Siggins, Joshua Prudden, Tomas Bugg, Sam Grimley, Jack Grimes, Jasper Pittard, Sam Darley, Will Minson, Jack Crisp, Jake Stringer, Sam Kerridge

NAMES SUITABLE FOR AN AGEING PEER OF THE REALM OR THE INCUMBENT OF A CRUMBLING ESTATE

George Horlin-Smith, Angus Monfries, Will Hoskin-Elliott, Tyrone Vickery, James Gwilt, Lewis Roberts-Thomson, Pearce Hanley

NAMES THAT FORM A COMPLETE SENTENCE WHEN EXPRESSED AS A COMMAND

Brad Crouch, Andrew Swallow, Jarrad Waite, Billy Longer

THE ANNUAL JARRAD LIST

Jaryd (1), Jarrad (5), Jared (3), Jarryd (3), Jarrod (2), Jarred (1) and their cousins Sharrod and Jarryn

MOST COMPELLINGLY NAMED DRAFT PICK YET TO PLAY A SENIOR GAME

Orazio Fantasia

NAMES SUITABLE FOR A HOME AND AWAY CHARACTER

Corey Enright, Brodie Martin, Jake Barrett, Kane Mitchell, Jamie Bennell, Robbie Tarrant, Zach Merrett

NAMES THAT SHOULD BE SUITABLE FOR A HOME AND AWAY CHARACTER

Majak Daw, Nic Naitanui, Bachar Houli, Shem Tatupu, Heritier Lumumba

A NAME THAT PROMPTS ONE TO LIE AWAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, PONDERING: “WHY? WHY? WHY DO I LIKE THIS NAME?”

Farren Ray

Peter Cronin

Peter Cronin is a Monthly contributor.

June 2014

From the front page

Image of Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews with screenshots from #IStandWithDan

Hopelessly devoted to Dan

The government is your servant, not your friend

‘The Lying Life of Adults’ by Elena Ferrante

The Neapolitan author returns to characters driven by compulsions and tensions of class

Image of New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern and ACT Chief Minister Andrew Barr

Labor and the Greens

In NZ and the ACT, the two parties have shown they can work together

Images of Prime Minister Scott Morrison and Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese

Bury the lead

Newspoll delivers an unwanted result for the Murdoch media


In This Issue

Clive Palmer the trickster

The Palmer United Party are anti-politics wildcards in Parliament

Richard Strauss in 1904. Photo by Edward Steichen

A century and a half of Richard Strauss

A look back at the last of the great Romantic composers

Nuclear waste at Muckaty

A trip to the site of a proposed nuclear waste dump on Aboriginal land in the Northern Territory

Follow You (detail), 2013, Wang Qingsong. Courtesy of White Rabbit Gallery.

‘Reformation’ at Sydney’s White Rabbit Gallery

Judith Neilson’s groundbreaking collection of contemporary Chinese art


More in The Nation Reviewed

Lost for words

Bryan Dawe on life without John Clarke

A minor language

If Footscray Primary’s Vietnamese program ends, what else is lost?

Illustration by Jeff Fisher

Injustice unmasked

What are the priorities of policing protests under lockdown?

Illustration by Jeff Fisher

Hysteria as metaphor

What chronic illness can teach us about the limits of the healthcare system during a global crisis


Read on

Image of Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews with screenshots from #IStandWithDan

Hopelessly devoted to Dan

The government is your servant, not your friend

Images of Prime Minister Scott Morrison and Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese

Bury the lead

Newspoll delivers an unwanted result for the Murdoch media

Image of author Craig Silvey

Character study: Craig Silvey on ‘Honeybee’

The author’s first novel since ‘Jasper Jones’ raises questions about who should tell contemporary trans stories

Image of Bill Murray and Rashida Jones in On the Rocks

Cocktail hour: ‘On the Rocks’

Bill Murray and Rashida Jones are a formidable duo in Sofia Coppola’s new film


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