June 2014

The Nation Reviewed

Names of the game

By Peter Cronin
A singular analysis of AFL players’ names

AFL FOOTBALLERS’ NAMES IN 2014 SUITABLE FOR A ROMANTIC WEEKEND GETAWAY DESTINATION

Beau Waters, Blake Acres, Jared Rivers, Oliver Wines, Michael Close, Brian Lake

NAMES SUITABLE FOR THE LOCATION OF SOME MISCHIEF, A MUGGING OR EVEN A MURDER

Harrison Marsh, Campbell Heath, Easton Wood, Bradley Hill, Dean Towers

NAMES RIPE FOR SPOONERISM

Jed Bews, Dane Rampe, Matt Shaw, Nat Fyfe, Karmichael Hunt

NAMES THAT SOUND REMARKABLY LIKE A BRAND 

Seb Tape, Jed Lamb, Claye Beams, Will Hams, Tayte Pears, Daniel Currie, Chris Dawes

SURNAMES SUITABLE FOR A COCKTAIL INCORPORATING CAMPARI OR AMARETTO

Cassisi, Firrito, Morabito, Deledio, Bontempelli, Menegola

SURNAMES SUITABLE FOR A MIDDLE-EUROPEAN SMOKED SAUSAGE

Schoenmakers, Schroder, Leuenberger, Petrenko, Malceski, Karnezis

NAMES SUITABLE FOR A RASCALLY, MISUNDERSTOOD CRIMINAL WITH A HEART OF GOLD OR A LOVEABLE ORPHAN WHO RISES ABOVE HIS STATION BY INHERITING A SUBSTANTIAL FORTUNE

Sam Siggins, Joshua Prudden, Tomas Bugg, Sam Grimley, Jack Grimes, Jasper Pittard, Sam Darley, Will Minson, Jack Crisp, Jake Stringer, Sam Kerridge

NAMES SUITABLE FOR AN AGEING PEER OF THE REALM OR THE INCUMBENT OF A CRUMBLING ESTATE

George Horlin-Smith, Angus Monfries, Will Hoskin-Elliott, Tyrone Vickery, James Gwilt, Lewis Roberts-Thomson, Pearce Hanley

NAMES THAT FORM A COMPLETE SENTENCE WHEN EXPRESSED AS A COMMAND

Brad Crouch, Andrew Swallow, Jarrad Waite, Billy Longer

THE ANNUAL JARRAD LIST

Jaryd (1), Jarrad (5), Jared (3), Jarryd (3), Jarrod (2), Jarred (1) and their cousins Sharrod and Jarryn

MOST COMPELLINGLY NAMED DRAFT PICK YET TO PLAY A SENIOR GAME

Orazio Fantasia

NAMES SUITABLE FOR A HOME AND AWAY CHARACTER

Corey Enright, Brodie Martin, Jake Barrett, Kane Mitchell, Jamie Bennell, Robbie Tarrant, Zach Merrett

NAMES THAT SHOULD BE SUITABLE FOR A HOME AND AWAY CHARACTER

Majak Daw, Nic Naitanui, Bachar Houli, Shem Tatupu, Heritier Lumumba

A NAME THAT PROMPTS ONE TO LIE AWAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, PONDERING: “WHY? WHY? WHY DO I LIKE THIS NAME?”

Farren Ray

Peter Cronin

Peter Cronin is a Monthly contributor.

June 2014

From the front page

Image of Buzz Aldrin next to flag on the Moon

Shooting beyond the Moon

Reflecting on the Apollo 11 mission as Mars beckons

Six years and counting

There is no hope in sight for hundreds of people on Manus Island and Nauru

The Djab Wurrung Birthing Tree

The highway construction causing irredeemable cultural and environmental damage

Detail of 'Man, Eagle and Eye in the Sky: Two Eagles', by Cai Guo-Qiang

Cai Guo-Qiang’s ‘The Transient Landscape’ and the Terracotta Warriors at the National Gallery of Victoria

The incendiary Chinese artist connects contemporary concerns with cultural history


In This Issue

Clive Palmer the trickster

The Palmer United Party are anti-politics wildcards in Parliament

Richard Strauss in 1904. Photo by Edward Steichen

A century and a half of Richard Strauss

A look back at the last of the great Romantic composers

Nuclear waste at Muckaty

A trip to the site of a proposed nuclear waste dump on Aboriginal land in the Northern Territory

Follow You (detail), 2013, Wang Qingsong. Courtesy of White Rabbit Gallery.

‘Reformation’ at Sydney’s White Rabbit Gallery

Judith Neilson’s groundbreaking collection of contemporary Chinese art


More in The Nation Reviewed

Illustration

Tear gas returns to Don Dale

Rolling back the reforms since the youth detention royal commission

Illustration

The Russell Street Bomber in the High Court

The unlikely source of a critical case for the nation’s separation of powers

Illustration

You’re the voice

Helping trans and non-binary gendered people define their vocal identity

Illustration

Statement of origin

Indigenous rugby league players lead a silent revolt on the national anthem


Read on

Image of Buzz Aldrin next to flag on the Moon

Shooting beyond the Moon

Reflecting on the Apollo 11 mission as Mars beckons

Image of Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese and CFMEU Victoria secretary John Setka

Judge stymies Albanese’s plans to expel Setka from ALP

A protracted battle is the last thing the Opposition needs

Image from ‘Booksmart’

Meritocracy rules in ‘Booksmart’

Those who work hard learn to play hard in Olivia Wilde’s high-school comedy

Image of Prime Minister Scott Morrison and Treasurer Josh Frydenberg

The government’s perverse pursuit of surplus

Aiming to be back in black in the current climate is bad economics


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