March 24, 2020

Sport

AFL names of the decade

By Hugh Robertson
Games may be cancelled, but the names play on

Names more appropriate for a different sport

Matthew Lobbe, Dean Polo, Andrew Strijk, Max Rooke, Paddy Ryder, Cale Hooker, Josh Caddy, Sam Rowe, Joel Garner, Josh Caddy, Ellyse Gamble

 

Honorary members of the Cartographers for Social Equality

Des Headland, Patrick Dangerfield, Jared Rivers, Aaron Sandilands, Emerson Woods, Stephen Hill, Brett Peake, Brian Lake, Emerson Woods, Trent Dumont

 

Obscure medieval monarchs

Jordan Gysberts, Rory Laird, Garrick Ibbotson, Albert Proud, Cleo Saxon-Jones, Cameron Bruce, Relton Roberts

 

Yeah, the boys

Rick Ladson

 

Don’t be such a…

(Daniel) Pratt, (Brad) Dick, (Evangeline) Gooch, (Graham) Johncock, (Monique) Conti, (Dean) Kent, (Ben) Ronke, (Sabreena) Duffy, (Will) Snelling

 

Nothing rhymes with orange, except…

Daniel Gorringe

 

The decennial Jared census

Jarrod (10), Jarrad (7), Jarryd (4), Jared (3), Jarred (1), Jaryd (1), Jarryn (1), Sharrod (1)

 

The unisex Taylor census

Taylor (8), Tayla (5), Taylah (2), Tyla (1), Taylin (1), Ty (1)

 

A holy double act

Hannah Priest, Taryn Priestly

 

The AFLX Hall of Fame

Roxanne Roux, Xavier Duursma, Nicola Xenos, Jaxson Barham, Jack Hiscox, Tom Derickx

 

Cut from the Gryffindor quidditch team, they turned to Aussie Rules

Mim Strom, Scott Gumbleton, Tahni Nestor, Oleg Markov, McKenzie Dowrick, Tarkyn Lockyer, Kalinda Howarth, Zephaniah Skinner, Emily Goodsir

 

Emissaries to the animal kingdom

Michael Gibbons, Brodie Moles, Erica Fowler, Nathan Eagleton, Justine Mules, Craig Bird, Jonathon Griffin, Sharnie Whiting, Aaron Mullett, Tomas Bugg, Kirsty Lamb, Michael Apeness, Jacob Heron, Tom Sparrow, Rhiannon Metcalfe

 

Names that are also short stories

Darcy Fort, Henry Playfair, Eddie Betts, Angelica Gogos, James Harmes, Daisy Pearce, Wayde Twomey

 

Former child stars now riding the nostalgia wave

Hamish Hartlett, Cameron Cloke, Georgia Gee, Farren Ray, Courtney Cramey, Marcus Marigliani, Rex Liddy, Serene Watson, Jackson Sheringham, Troy Taylor, Jackson Trengove, Dakota Davidson, Montana McKinnon

 

One of a kind: the only players with this name during the past decade

Tarkyn, Setanta, Steele, Tiarna, Cruize, Alipate, Cheynee, Mhicca, Roarke, Kirby, Rhylee, Bernie, Becchara, Rhan, Denby, Farren, Kamdyn, Kyal, Blayne, Blaine, Taylin, Danyle

 

 

Hugh Robertson

Hugh Robertson manages a record label, writes a lot and thinks about the Sydney Swans too much.

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