Ten of the most amusing reads of 2011 from the Shortlist Daily.

I'm sorry I bit you during my job interview "It was great to meet with you and learn more about the company. Please don’t hesitate to call or email if you have any more questions for me."

– McSweeney's

Thirteen Observations made by Lemony Snicket while watching Occupy Wall Street from a Discreet Distance

– Occupy Writers

The Murdochs hug it out – Succession problems, Murdoch-style.

– New York Times

How drunk can you get at your office Christmas party? A handy guide "You need a drink because it softens the awkwardness of mixing work relationships with holiday merriment, but drink too much and you'll end up in a situation that's far more awkward. Ideally you want to locate yourself right on the boundary of personal embarrassment."

– New York Magazine

The comments on God's Blog "UPDATE: Pretty pleased with what I've come up with in just six days. Going to take tomorrow off. Suggestions and criticism (constructive, please!) more than welcome..." (Scroll down for comments)

– New Yorker

Book reviews demystified "Many readers come from outside the literary community's gilded sanctum and struggle to understand its strange customs. To combat these difficulties, we have compiled and translated some of our favorite clichés..."

– Full Stop

You shut your goddamn carbon-taxin' mouth "The only apparent solution is a massive airdop of Xanax into our reservoirs, because really, everyone needs a few deep breaths and a spell in the quiet corner." OR: for a less potty-mouthed version, click here

– Heathen Scripture

Call and response: Michael Bay and an angry projectionist "How about throwing us a bone and making a movie with recognisably human characters, plotting that wasn't put together by a developmentally-challenged robot that once read a Robert McKee book, and that doesn't resemble a two-and-a-half-hour beer commercial?"

– Indiewire

Text slang for baby boomers "TXT L8R = Can't find reading glasses; WWIS = What was I saying?"

– New Yorker

Andrew Bolt Greeting Cards for Freedom!

– Crikey

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